Background Opinions

I am the wife of a United States Infantry Soldier, currently serving with the National Guard for deployment to Iraq for a second tour of duty.

During my husband’s first deployment, I was Coordinator/Chairperson of the Family Support Group (FSG) for our Unit. Our FSG worked diligently to provide supplies for the Unit as well as hygiene, footwear, toys, candies and a much needed wheelchair for a small Iraqi boy who dragged himself upon the ground for life.

During my time as the Coordinator, I learned quickly that many Foundations and supporters of Troops are unfortunately bogged down with red-tape when it comes to donating funds, services, or time. Often times Board Members took months if not longer to make simple decisions, while the FSG and soldiers waited for the outcome. Board members could not agree on standards and methods of delivery. I realized that making decisions by committee results in mediocrity.

When my husband returned from Iraq, he went through a period of what is commonly referred to now as PTSD. Other soldier’s within the Unit also exhibited these signs. Some soldier’s would visit their local family doctor to get assistance. Often time’s civilian doctors do not understand the signs of PTSD for soldiers, and these soldier’s were managed with medications used for standard depression. Other soldier’s veered away from the medication option and found their answers at the bottom of a bottle. Many more decided to do nothing, and still have issues today. A fractional splinter group of soldier’s decided to get together once a week and sit and talk with each other about their experiences.

Over the past two years, I have been digging deep into the needs of our military. We all know what has happened recently with Walter Reed Medical Center. That is but the tip of the iceberg of issues. Soldiers do not want career repercussions when it comes to mental or physical health. They will first and foremost stand strong and say “nothing is wrong”. This is part of their conditioning, but also their pride in being a soldier. The Nation expects them to be ever vigilant and a sign of strength, and they hold themselves to that standard as well. To offer assistance is considered a “stab”, so assistance has to be worked around in a different way. I have the distinct opportunity to be on a personal level to understanding and figuring out how to develop and apply this assistance.

It is now 2007. It has been 4 years since 9/11, and 4 years since the US Military deployed to Iraq to begin ridding the world of terrorist who want nothing more than the complete annihilation of Americans and anyone they view as a threat. Terrorists are not in business to reform Americans. They do not want our opinion, a democracy, or working governments run for the people by the people. That is considered silly westerners philosophy. Dictatorship, regime control, and genocide are really all they know. Changing the status quo is not acceptable.

So our soldier’s make the sacrifice to go stand against terrorists, against regime control, and against the death and destruction of a people who just want to go to bed at night without mortars sounding in the background, or waking up dead. When the American soldier’s return home, they are disheveled, and their thoughts are plagued with atrocities we will never understand because we as Americans do not have to set foot upon foreign soil to see for ourselves.

Soldiers are not in the military for the benefits or income. The health benefits of welfare recipients are far better than that of Tri Care. The income of a regular soldier often times doesn’t even cover monthly expenses. Many soldiers are forced to apply and qualify for state assistance food programs just because of this. Yet the military family will prevail regardless. Survival is paramount, complaining is optional.

Before this deployment developed, I worked diligently for hours a day, in a regular job, regular meetings to attend, and a regular home life filled with normal tasks. Now I find myself able to multi-task daily household issues, while simultaneously talking care of my children’s needs, filing forms, writing proposals, conference calls, and 10 months of reaching out to Corporations and Foundations who support the military, the disabled, the elderly, and the children of our Nation. The only distraction I suffer from is the impending DOOM of my husband’s presence in a War zone. It is a feeling of despair and cool throbbing headaches that ruin an otherwise nice day of “business”. It is the slow creeping feeling of being completely scared for him as well, which tries to invade my working thoughts, and push back progress.

We as a society do not TRUST each other anymore. There is no simple conversation and done deal, or firm handshake, and it’s better than written in stone. We don’t have that willingness to accept that a person will be completely HONEST with us, and offer us a good deal. There is no possibility of a promise that will not be broken, or a promise that will come to fruition. Yet here I am that exact type of person, who still believes in the goodness of man. I still believe.

I have faith that my husband will return home to me this time without “winning” a purple heart again, and I have faith that there really is support for our troops out there somewhere, waiting with their finger on the “yes we can and will” button.